De Arimasu 4

Keroro Gunso
Keroro Shotai, Raido Shotai, Garuru Shotai – Battle for the Kero Ball! …de arimasu.

“What if we tried to cause a world-wide disease that wouldn’t actually KILL the Pekoponians but made them so weak that they couldn’t even get out of bed?” Kururu asked.
“No! That’s terrible!” Dororo barked.
“Not with the right kind of chips it’s not,” Kururu replied. (Jeff Dunham ref.)
“Wait- what…?”
So far, the meeting had been like this since they had started three hours before. Tamama began to grow a sense of doubt. Even with help from a complete other Platoon, progress was going nowhere. It didn’t help that Keroro kept constantly leaving the room without giving an explanation. Tamama wasn’t the only one to notice.
As Dororo began to give another suggestion, Keroro stood up again. He turned to walk out of the room but Giroro put his leg out and tripped him. Keroro squeaked and collapsed to the floor. Giroro got up quickly and jabbed a gun to his head.
“You ARE the leader, you know. What could possibly be so important that you feel like leaving the room every five minutes is necessary?” he snarled.
“Bladder infection?” Keroro lied. Giroro dug the gun further.
“Try again,” he hissed.
“I-I have a very good reason!” Keroro insisted. He jerked himself out of Giroro’s hold. He went to one of his many cluttered shelves and began ransacking it. Finally, he pulled out the Kero Ball.
“…yes. You still have it. And?” Daikiki asked.
“Well… Fuyuki-dono doesn’t know. I think it would be better if he didn’t. I’ve been trying to keep my eye on him to make sure he doesn’t go to his room. Undoubtedly, he’ll try to take back what he thought he had out of my grasp,” Keroro explained.
“Has he tried?” Tamama asked.
“Sorta. He tried to go upstairs, but I told him that I saw an unusual critter scurrying about the floor in the kitchen. Of course, this got him searching the kitchen and Natsumi standing on a chair. They have NO idea that I was referring to Giroro the whole time.”
“HEY!” Giroro snapped.
“Gunso… I hope you don’t mind me asking, but what is that?” Raido asked. Tamama snapped a shocked look at him. Why didn’t he know?
“Nani? Raido, EVERY Keronian leader has one of these,” Keroro said.
“Well, except someone that I know who USED to have one that a certain someone BROKE,” Giroro said, shifting his eyes at Keroro several times.
“I take no hints of your shifty eyes, Giroro,” Keroro replied.
“Wait. Every Keronian leader has one?” Hikiki asked. Of course, Nozizi reacted to this immaturely.
“Heyyyyyyy… Raido-senpai, why don’t YOU have a weird thingy?” he asked.
“That’s what she said,” Daikiki coughed. (As this was said, Raido looked disturbed and crossed his legs. Kururu began to snicker, which got him a dirty look from Hikiki.)
“Well… Nozizi… I… I’m sure that the Commander had other things on his mind…” Raido stuttered.
“That’s what she said,” Daikiki coughed again.
“Huh… strange that they didn’t give you one. They didn’t give Gamama one either, I assume?” Keroro asked.
“Not that we know of; no,” Hikiki replied.
“Oh, well. We probably don’t need two anyway,” Keroro smiled, putting his arm around Raido, “I mean, this thing is powerful enough. Two balls aren’t always better than one, right? Well… two balls are good too.” Raido sweatdropped.
“That’s what she said,” Daikiki coughed a third time.
“Okay, you REALLY need to shut up, sicko!” Raido snapped.
Abruptly, the small red ball at the end of the antennae blinked and made a weird noise. Daikiki burst into peals of laughter. Hikiki kicked him.
“You are such a pervert!” she yelled.
“What’s going on?” Giroro asked.
Keroro looked it over.
“That’s a signal from another Platoon,” he replied quietly.
“One with a ball?” Raido asked.
“That’s what-”
“SHUT UP, DAIKIKI!”
“I don’t know. If they DO have one, they didn’t use it to give a signal,” Keroro said.
The ball made a blipping noise.
“That’s funny. It sounds like they’re pretty close,” Keroro said. Just then, a loud roar sounded off and the room trembled.
“Did someone just land a ship?” Raido asked.
Keroro stared at the ceiling in terror.
“Come on guys, let’s go check it out…” he said quietly. The ten filed out. Tamama grew very worried. He knew Keroro was scared. What could be waiting for them?
The two Platoons reached the front yard and spotted a third. Tamama recognized them immediately. So did Keroro.
“Garuru!” he gasped. The light purple Keronian smiled slightly.
“Precisely,” he replied, then glancing at Giroro, “Long time no see. Invasion plans going well, little brother?” Giroro’s face reddened.
“Th-That’s none of your business!” he screamed.
“Who are you guys?” Raido asked. Garuru and his Platoon acknowledged him.
“My name is Lieutenant Garuru,” Garuru replied, “I’m the leader of this Platoon and Giroro’s older brother.” Tamama glared angrily at his former student from the Garuru Platoon. The light blue Keronian stepped up beside his leader enthusiastically.
“I’m First Class Private Taruru! Nice to meet you!” he grinned. The red tadpole next to him frowned and shoved him over.
“Don’t be so familiar! I’m Recruit Tororo, and I plan to bring misery to you AND your Platoon!” he barked. The grey, half-android Keronian next to him crossed his arms.
“My name is Lance Corporal Zoruru. My only reason for being here is to see your friend, Zeroro,” he hissed, referring to Dororo.
“Thaaaaat’s whaaaaat sheeee saaaaid!” Daikiki singsonged. Eddodo kicked him. Zoruru’s half-face turned red.
The last member was very different from the others. Not only was she the only female on the Platoon, but she also appeared to have no intentions of fighting the two Platoons.
“I’m Chief Medic Pururu,” the pastel-purple girl smiled. She glanced over at Keroro and smiled sweetly, waving to him. Keroro blushed. Tamama was upset by this.
“And who may we ask are you queeroes?” Tororo asked bluntly. Raido frowned.
“I’m Lieutenant Raido, and I might be a new leader, but I’ve still got my friends to back me up!” he replied.
“I’m Corporal Daikiki, and I’m the brawn and beauty of this Platoon, so just don’t touch my face and you’re fine!” Daikiki announced. His comrades sweatdropped.
“Daikiki might be vain, but I’m First Class Nozizi: the cute ninja of the Platoon with little patience, so don’t mess with me! Also, how old are you and do you play checkers?” Nozizi asked. Eddodo rolled his eyes and pushed Nozizi over.
“Me Lance Corporal Eddodo. Me squash annoying red tadpole like bug!” he announced.
“And I’m Sergeant Major Hikiki,” Hikiki finished, “I’m the brains and computer hacker of the Platoon,” then she smiled proudly, “Not to mention that I’m now an inventor.”
Tororo took a sudden interest in her.
“A hacker AND an inventor, huh?” he asked, and then evilly grinning, “Boy, is your Platoon in trouble if you’ve got a GIRL for brains!” The entire Raido Platoon suddenly appeared angry; Raido seemed more furious than any of them.
“Now, you listen-!” he started, but Kururu interrupted.
“Take it back,” he snarled, pulling out a large gun and aiming at Tororo. Tororo pulled out a gun of equal size and pointed it back at Kururu.
“Kiss it, dirt-bag!” he shot.
“STOP IT, BOTH OF YOU DINGBATS!” Hikiki yelled.
“Well, now that we have the introductions out of the way, hand over the Kero Ball. The deadline is days away; we’ll take it from here,” Garuru said.
“Hey… you’re a leader aren’t you?” Raido asked.
“Yes; what’s your point?” Garuru asked.
“Well… why don’t you have your OWN Kero Ball…?”
“That’s what she said.”
“Corporal, I’m warning you-!”
“A certain somebody broke mine,” Garuru interrupted, glaring at Giroro. Giroro pointed at Keroro. Garuru then redirected his glare at Keroro.
“I’m not playing around. HQ is growing very impatient and we want the job done right. Give us the Kero Ball,” he snarled.
“What Kero Ball?” Keroro asked stupidly.
“Don’t play stupid with me, you’ve got it right there in your hand,” Garuru replied. Keroro was quiet a moment.
“What hand?” he asked slowly. Garuru frowned and pointed a large cannon at Keroro.
“I warned you!” he snarled.
“Lieutenant, no!” Pururu cried.
“Alright! Alright! I’ll give it to you!” Keroro said nervously.
“What?! You can’t just give up like that!” Giroro yelled.
“You have to stand up for your Platoon! Don’t surrender so easily!” Raido scolded.
“Guys… don’t make this hard for me…” Keroro said quietly, walking towards Garuru with the Kero Ball. Tamama couldn’t believe this; it was so unlike his leader. Er… sort of…
“Good boy, now let us take this invasion into our own hands,” Garuru said. Keroro started to hand him the Kero Ball, but froze. He whirled around and whisked it at Raido.
“RAIDO, CATCH!” he called.
“What?!” Raido yelped. He quickly caught the Kero Ball.
“Augh, infantile action. Taruru, retrieve it,” Garuru ordered.
“Hai, Lieutenant!” Taruru said, going towards Raido. The red Keronian became nervous.
“Eh… GIRORO, CATCH!” he yelled, tossing it to Giroro.
“Huh?” Giroro asked, catching it. Garuru started to approach him. Giroro looked over and tossed it.
“Catch, Daikiki!” he announced. Daikiki screamed as it hit him in the face.
“AUGH! MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL FACE! YOU KILLED IT! I FEEL BLOOD! I’M DYING! YOU MURDERER!” he howled, rolling around on the grass. His face was perfectly fine. Nozizi rolled his eyes and grabbed the Kero Ball from off the ground. Tororo started to go towards him.
“Catch it, Dororo!” he called, trying to throw it. It stuck to his hand due to his sweaty palms and Sticky-hand condition. It wouldn’t come off. Tororo was getting closer. Finally, he slammed it on the ground, pressing down a button that caused the Kero Ball to send out an electrical current which fried Tororo.
The Kero Ball came off Nozizi’s hands. Hikiki grabbed it and tossed it at Kururu.
“Catch, dingbat!” she called. Kururu caught it.
“Oh, I see what you’re playing,” Tororo said, getting up off the ground and heading towards him. Kururu looked at the Ball a minute.
“Me too,” he said, “Catch, Dororo!”
Dororo caught the Kero Ball.
“This isn’t amusing; stop it!” Zoruru snarled, storming towards him. Dororo threw it towards Tamama. He jumped up in attempt to grab it. Suddenly, Taruru shoved him to the ground and caught it.
“HAH! I got it, Lieutenant! Did you see that? Did you see me?” he grinned.
“RAIDO IMPACT!” Raido screamed and blasted Taruru with his deathblow. Taruru shrieked and dropped the Kero Ball. Tamama quickly picked it up and threw it to Keroro.
“And that’s the Keroro Platoon and the Raido Platoon for you, Garuru! Bask in our glory! Go on – BASK IN IT!” Keroro demanded.
“We aren’t giving up yet,” Garuru said, making a grab for the Kero Ball. Keroro threw it to Hikiki quickly, who threw it to Daikiki, who threw it to Giroro who threw it to Dororo, who started to throw it to Kururu, but was hit in the side by Zoruru. The Kero Ball flew in the air and Pururu caught it.
“Good work, Zoruru and Pururu,” Garuru said. Pururu looked at the Kero Ball and then at Keroro.
“NO! DON’T YOU DARE EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!” Tororo screamed. Pururu was hesitant, but eventually drew her hand back.
“Catch, Keroro!” she said, throwing it to Keroro.
“NO! WHY?!” Garuru barked.
“Arigato, Pururu-chan!” Keroro grinned. Garuru armed himself with two large guns.
“I didn’t want this to get messy, seeing that you lead my younger brother’s Platoon, but if we want Pekopon invaded, we’re going to get it done right,” he said.
“Do what you gotta do, but this invasion is ours,” Keroro spat.
“So be it,” Garuru snarled.
He started to aim the guns at Keroro. Tamama let his demon take over. He blasted his deathblow furiously at Garuru, missing just barely. Taruru threw himself at Tamama pinning him against the ground.
“I’m sorry, Master,” he snarled through his teeth. His eyes began to glow as he charged a deathblow. Eddodo hurled himself at Taruru and the two bickered angrily as they fought. Other fighting occurred behind Tamama, but he didn’t care about it at the moment; Eddodo couldn’t take Taruru on his own.
As Tamama feared, Taruru and Eddodo began to store deathblows. He quickly stored his own and sent out his with Eddodo’s. Taruru blasted back full-force. Even with the strength of two deathblows, Taruru’s was still overpowering. Raido joined in. The strength still wasn’t enough.
With a flash of white, Tamama, Eddodo, and Raido shamefully lost the duel.
“That’ll teach you to mess with me!” Taruru screamed. Tamama sat up weakly; his entire body burned and he felt as if he had dislocated his shoulder.
“Guys! You okay?” Daikiki asked, helping Tamama to his feet.
“Y-Yeah,” he muttered. Eddodo and Raido took great difficulty in getting up. Taruru began storing another deathblow.
He blasted it out. Raido abruptly engulfed his body in a large transparent blue sphere which emitted electricity. Taruru’s deathblow reflected against it and turned against its owner.
“Nice, Raido,” Daikiki smiled.
“Thanks,” Raido said; a weak smile was on his face followed by a wince.
He looked up and observed the fight.
“Daikiki, take out Tororo,” he said. Daikiki rolled his eyes.
“Why? He’s weak; what good would that do?” he asked.
“Just do it! He’s the brains behind the Platoon and probably has tricks up his sleeves!”
“Yeah, yeah, think what you want. Garuru’s a bigger threat than that tadpole,” Daikiki spat, taking off to fight Garuru. Raido snarled furiously.
“Daikiki, listen to me!” he yelled.
“It’s okay! I’ve got it!” Hikiki called out. She joined Kururu in the brawl with Tororo. The tadpole immediately grabbed out a small silver device with a button. He pressed it with a quick “Pochito!” and the device activated, causing controlled wires to burst from out of the Earth and wrap around Kururu and Hikiki, making them potentially helpless.
Eddodo left Tamama’s side for only a second to attack Tororo. Giroro ignored his brother for but a minute to aim his gun at the wires and set his friends free. The moment the wires released them, Garuru shot the gun from his hand. He pushed his brother to the side and continued to pursue Keroro, who was now terrified.
“Now, Keroro Gunso, hand it over,” he snapped.
“DON’T YOU DARE GIVE IT TO HIM!” Hikiki shrieked, assaulting Garuru from behind. This, of course, had the rest of his Platoon after her. Zoruru managed to pry her off and throw her to the ground. She flipped backwards and grabbed the gun that Giroro had been stripped of and took aim at Zoruru. Garuru aimed towards her and pulled the trigger. Out of nowhere, Raido jumped in front and took the bullet in the arm.
“Raido!” Keroro gasped. Almost obliviously, he slammed his finger against a button on the Kero Ball. The laser that had previously zap-fried Tororo shot Garuru.
“Nice shot, Keroro,” Giroro commented.
“That was accidental,” Keroro said, examining the Kero Ball as if he had never seen it before.
Slowly and weakly, Garuru got up.
“Okay, okay…” he panted, “That’s enough. Retreat.” Taruru got up weakly and made his leave. Zoruru walked slowly past Dororo. As he started to pass Nozizi, he made an attempt to slice him open with the blade on the back of his left hand. Dororo made a quick dash and threw himself in harm’s way. A large gash split across his left side; his blood spattered the grass. Nozizi squeaked.
“ZORURU!” Garuru snapped, “THAT’S ENOUGH!” Zoruru snapped a glare at his leader. He glowered angrily down at Dororo and reluctantly obeyed Garuru’s orders. They boarded the ship and took off.
“Dororo! Are you okay?” Giroro asked, bending down beside his side. Dororo gave a raspy croaking noise, but didn’t utter a comprehendible word.
“Dororo-senpai, I’m so sorry!” Nozizi bawled.
“Let’s get back inside,” Keroro said.
“I’ll help,” Pururu volunteered.
“What YOU still doing here?” Eddodo snarled.
“Yeah, What ARE you still doing here?! Nobody wants you; get lost!” Tamama barked.
“Tamama! Eddodo! Back off!” Keroro snapped, “Sorry about them, Pururu.”
“It’s okay. I guess I deserved it. …sort of…” Pururu said confusedly.
Once inside, Pururu helped everyone patch up; particularly helping Dororo.
“It’s funny that he attacked your left side; he never forgave you for destroying his,” Pururu said.
“It’s not funny!” Nozizi snapped, tears dribbling down his cheeks. Pururu chuckled.
“I don’t mean funny ‘ha ha’,” she assured him.
“Jerk,” Daikiki muttered, “A pretty jerk, but a jerk nonetheless.”
“Be nice. Pururu’s not a bad person,” Keroro said, “Neither is the rest of her Platoon.” Nozizi shot a glare at him. Keroro corrected himself, “Okay, so Zoruru’s a bad person…” Tamama glared, “Okay… and Taruru…” Kururu glared, “…Tororo too…”
Finally, Raido shot a menacing glare.
“Okay, Garuru might have gone a little overboard. He’s not bad though!” Keroro insisted.
“A little overboard?” Raido snarled, “He shot at my girlfriend; that’s murder!”
“No! …it would only be murder if she had died. It was ‘Attempted.’ …and you committed suicide.”
“In Hikiki’s defense! I’m sure any of you would have done the same!”
“But… we didn’t.”
“Jerk.”
“Sounds like you guys aren’t doing so well,” Pururu said.
“Yeah?! What gave you that impression?!” Raido snapped.
“OKAY, BACK OFF! PURURU HELPED US OUT, REMEMBER?!” Keroro screamed. Raido loosened up.
“Sorry. I’m just a bit stirred up…” he said to Pururu.
“I understand,” Pururu replied, “You sound very devoted to her.” Raido looked over at Hikiki.
“Yeah… I am,” he replied. Hikiki smiled and cuddled with him. Kururu snorted.
“Regardless, he still shot at her and you didn’t get up and fight back, Pansy,” he snarled.
“Why don’t you fall in a hole?” Hikiki snapped. Kururu didn’t reply.
“Perhaps that’s why you lost,” Pururu muttered under her breath.
“If you have something to say, by all means, share it with us,” Hikiki snarled.
“I’m just saying that maybe if you all didn’t fight amongst yourselves so much and worked as a team, you would’ve been better off,” Pururu said.
“WE DID SO WORK TOGETHER! KEEP YOUR WORTHLESS OPINIONS TO YOURSELF, B****!” Hikiki yelled. (Raido looked alarmed by the choice word, Kururu appeared vaguely amused.)
“STOP IT!” Keroro screamed in a high-pitched shriek.
“Lower your voices, please…” Dororo murmured.
“Oh, hi,” Keroro smiled at him, “How long have you been up?”
“I was never unconscious,” Dororo frowned.
“Dororo-senpai, I didn't mean for you to get hurt on my account! Forgive me, domo..." Nozizi pleaded, hugging onto Dororo. Dororo smiled at him.
"I'd rather die than let anyone hurt a friend," he said.
Tamama felt all of the hate and anger that lingered in his body slowly fade away. Everyone's expressions loosened, including his own. Of all of them, Nozizi and Dororo were still very calm and forgiving. Tamama immediately regretted all of the fighting that had gone on between the Keroro Platoon and the Raido Platoon.
"Gunso..." Raido said quietly. Tamama turned his head in Raido's direction. His head was lowered.
"R-Raido, what's wrong?" Keroro asked.
"What if... What if this was never meant to be? What if we aren't supposed to be together?" he asked.
"No, don't say that!" Keroro pleaded, growing upset, "We're completely compatible! We have so many likenesses and strengths! We're totally meant to be!"
"But... all of this fighting..." Raido muttered.
"We'll get over it! There's always rocks in the road, but we have to move past them. It won't always be this way... we belong together..." Keroro said. Daikiki stifled laughter. He looked like he was about to burst. Raido sighed.
"Let it out of your system," he said.
"THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" Daikiki exploded. Everyone sweatdropped.
"Raido, what a beautiful thing to be concerned about," Pururu smiled, "The way two teams work as one..."
"But they way they were talking made it sound like a love affair between Gunso and Rai-Rai," Daikiki grinned. Keroro sweatdropped.
"...we weren't...?" he asked. Everyone abruptly looked at him.
"Just kidding!" Keroro grinned, striking a funny pose.
"Idiot," Giroro sighed.
"I guess I should leave now," Pururu said, "You'll be okay on your own, won't you?"
"We aren't on our own," Keroro smiled.
"Heh, of course not," Pururu chuckled, "Good luck."
"Bye! Thanks, Pururu-chan!" Keroro grinned.
"Arigato, Pururu-chan," the other nine chirped.
As Pururu left, Raido sighed.
"I guess today's battle was a wake up call," he said.
"It felt more like a slap in the face," Tamama retorted.
"Still," Keroro objected, "I think today displayed exactly how much we work together."
"But we do," Daikiki said.
"Oh, really?" Raido snarled, shooting a glare at him. Tamama realized he was refering to Daikiki ignoring Raido's order.
"That's what I'm talking about. No more arguements," Keroro said, "We've got less than two weeks. We can't waste another moment."
"Agreed," Raido nodded.
"From here on, we're getting serious. No more fooling around," Keroro said.
"Hallelujah! Hark the Herald Angel Sing!" Giroro cried, "I never thought I'd hear those words coming from you!"
"Stop fooling around. We're getting serious," Keroro said disapprovingly. Giroro's eye twitched.
"Me?!" he snapped. Everyone laughed. Only while they could.



Twelve days remained.